Are You the nanny??

When you live on the upper west side there are some things that you get use to. The women who don't wear bras in the summer with white sun dresses. The the smell of dog pee on every block because everyone has a dog, and of course the nanny's with the very expensive strollers. No matter where you go in this neighborhood you will see nanny's with anywhere between 1 and 3 children. Most of these nanny's are Latina, African America, or West Indian.

Growing up in a Puerto Rican lower middle income household the idea of a nanny did not exist. If you needed someone to take care of your kids for the night you had a family member or the neighbor who also has kids to babysit for you. Even now, I have a hard time with the idea of getting a nanny even thought I might need one in the near future.

After being home for the first three months of my sons life I decided that I wanted to take Gymboree classes. I thought it would be a good to have some place to go twice a week and I would have a chance to meet other moms who lived in the neighborhood. My mom and my sister said that I would probably meet nanny's, but I didn't think moms would want their nanny's to take their kids to Gymboree since its such a wonderful bonding experience.  I went to my first class and to my surprised, all the adults were nanny's, I was the only mom.  It's really strange to be the only parent in a room with 12 other women.  It turns out that not only do the nanny's take the babies to Gymboree, some of the moms are home and they send the nanny instead of going themselves.. Now I get the whole nanny thing if you decide to go back to work, work from home, or if you have multiple small children at home and you need the extra help. But to be a stay home mom who also has a nanny and doesn't take the opportunity to do things with your baby like Gymboree, I just don't get it.

Check out the nanny it the upper right corner

I learned real quick that I was a strange duck in this pond of nanny's. Not only did I stay home with my son and take care of him without help, I am a Latina woman who lives in this neighborhood (who also has an expensive stroller). When I looked around the Gymboree class, the street and the park, I realized that I looked like the nanny. It became normal for people to ask me if I was Francisco's mother or his nanny. I am fair skinned, and obviously Latina, my son is also fair and it is possible that he doesn't belong to me even though I think he looks like me. The sad thing is, I don't get offended. How can I?, it's the culture of this neighborhood and my situation is very rare.

After a couple of weeks in my Gymboree class I did meet some mothers who stayed home with their children without any help and we have become friends.  I've also made friends with some of the nanny's, and while nanny's tend to stick together I don't see why I can't become friends with them since there or more of them around.  Besides I'll need a nanny in the future and this gives me a chance to do some head hunting...


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