The New York Baby Show

When I found out that the New York Baby Show was going to take place on the weekend of my birthday, I decided that buying a ticket to go would be my gift to myself. I let all my friends know that they could join me at the baby show, or at brunch afterwards. Now that I've gone once, I will go every year; I had so much fun.

When going to an event like this you need a plan of attack. First you need people to go with you so you can get the most samples possible. Second it's best if those friends have no interest or need for those products. I took my mom, aunt, and 2 close friends; I was the only one with babies...ha ha ha I kept everything... Third you need to have a lot of enthusiasm. Vendors love it when your excited about their product, and most of the time they will give you more stuff if you show how excited you are. My friend Annette always seems to charm vendors, and while people walk away with one sample I've seen her get boxes of samples; she is a genius..  Finally, you need a car.  I live in NYC so I took the train, thank goodness my father came and picked up the baby with the car. Going to brunch with 10 bags would not have been fun.

Sofia testing the merchandise

In addition to samples, I got a whole bunch of coupons. I went to the store and saved $7 with every container of formula I bought. When formula is $30 a pop I'll gladly take $7; it's a small amount but in the long run it makes a difference. That is just one example of savings, I got coupons for food, toys, diapers, wipes, and so many other great products. The next time you here about a Baby Show or any product show in your city I suggest you go.

An inventory of everything I got...
14 baby mum-mums
2 Ella's kitchen food packets
4 gerber graduate food packets
5 beech nut food packets
4 packets of happy tot food packets
3 jars of beech nut peaches and pineapple baby food
8 bottles of ready to use Enfamil formula
8 enfagrow milk drinks
3 babyganics mini laundry detergent.
3 ology babyb shampoo and body wash
3 avent bottles
2 toddler t-shirts from PCVSTliving.com
2 Goya onesies
4 beech nut baby spoons
1 syringe spoon, 1 honey Chapstick & 1 cooking spatula from Honey.com

 Would you take your kid hiking with this??

3 Northeast doulas lavender pouches
2 pencils from bity bean
1 pen from ergo baby
10 reusable shopping bags
Enough coupons to save hundreds of dollars.

Its a good thing they gave us bags, I needed a shopping cart.

Crocheting a Simple Baby Hat

Ever since I had my daughter I haven't had a chance to crochet.  Last night my son went to bed unusually early and Sofia happen to be sleeping too.  I took this opportunity to make a hat that would match the outfit Sofia was going to wear the next day. 

When making a simple hat I usually don't follow a pattern. I figured out the size by comparing it to a baby hat that already fit her. She is currently 2 months, so I would say this hat would fit a baby 0-3 months. While this is a simple pattern, I have never written a patten before so I think you might need to have some basic knowledge of crocheting to follow it.

Yarn used: Lion Brand Microfiber
Weight Category: 3 - DK Weight: Light Worsted Yarn
2.50 oz./70 g (168 yd/154 m)
100% Micro-Fiber Acrylic
Hook size 5mm

A Simple Baby Hat Pattern
1st Row: Chain 4, double crochet in first chain 11 times (the 3 chains count at a double crochet through out). Connect with slip stitch.

2nd Row: chain 3, double crochet in same space as chain 3. Double crochet twice in each stitch until you get to the end and connect with slip stitch.

3rd Row: chain 3, double crochet in same space as chain 3, double crochet in the next stitch. *2 double crochet in the next stitch, 1 double crochet in the next stitch. Repeat until you get to the end from *. Connect with slip stitch.

4th Row: chain 3, double crochet in same space as chain 3, 1 double crochet in the next 2 stitches. *2 double crochet in the next stitch, 1 double crochet in the next 2 stitches. Repeat until you get to the end from *. Connect with slip stitch

5th Row: chain 3, double crochet in same space as chain 3, 1 double crochet in the next 5 stitches. *2 double crochet in the next stitch, 1 double crochet in the next 5 stitches. Repeat until you get to the end from *. Connect with slip stitch

Rows 6-14: chain 3, double crochet in each stitch until you reach the end. Connect with slip stitch.

OPTIONS:
-You can create a ribbed edge by alternating front and back post stitches in rows 11-14.
-You can make the edge fancy by adding a shell stitch pattern on the 14th row.
-You can make the hat a couple of rows longer and create a slouchy look or you can fold it up. 
-Add a flower.  You can use the pattern given below.


Flower Pattern

Damn It! I Have to Buy a Double Stroller...

20 months ago I had my first baby, and it was so exciting.  I did endless amounts of research on high chairs, reusable diapers, development, and of course strollers.  After living on the Upper West Side for 2 years I had seen some really nice strollers.  The Stokke, Bugaboo, Uppababy, iCandy, Snap and Go, City Mini..etc...  After much consideration I really wanted the Bugaboo. You could attach a car seat, it had a bassinet and a toddler seat that went up to 3 year.  You could face the baby towards you or outward.  The most impressive part were all the wheel settings, it had a city setting, off road setting and beach setting (I got to use the beach setting twice).  For all these fabulous features it cost only $1200, but that's because when I sent my husband to buy it he decided that the special edition denim version was sexy.  I love my Bugaboo, but it is a big ass stroller...

My big ass stroller

Over time we have accumulated 2 more strollers, a Chicco which is only 17lbs and easier to take places.  We also have a Babies r Us umbrella stroller which is about 3lbs and can be taken anywhere because it is so small, but it doesn't
recline and isn't a good stroller to be out in all day.  Now I live in NYC and while my apartment is a good size, I don't have the room for 3 strollers; so when we found out that we were going to have a 2nd baby we cringed and the thought of a double stroller.  We live on the Upper West Side which is saturated with double strollers and those things are huge.  The last thing we wanted to do is spend more money on another stroller that is twice the size of the expensive stroller we already have.

Fast Forward to the present....I have been home on maternity for 2 months and it has been very hard going out on my own.  At first it wasn't a big deal because it was still winter and I had no desire to leave the house, but now that its spring time I want to go out with my munchkins.  I was thinking that I could get the little board that attaches to the Bugaboo for Francisco to stand on, but he is still small and he gets tired.  If we go out for a long period of time we put Francisco in the Chicco and I put Sofia in the carrier.  This works out great because if Francisco needs to nap he can; the stroller is small and if we go to a restaurant he sits in a highchair and I can put Sofia down in the reclined stroller.  It sounds like I have it all figured out doesn't it??  Well I don't, this only works if I'm not alone.  I found out very quickly that I am confined to the apartment if I'm alone; unless I'm walking over to meet someone who can then help.  This REALLY SUCKS!!!

So....A couple of days ago when it was really nice out, I caught my son looking out the window.  I felt bad that I couldn't take him out.  Even if I put Sofia in the carrier and we go for a walk I don't have the ability to pick him up or run around with him.  This is when it hit me, I would have to give in and buy a double stroller....Damn it!

25 vs 35

My life has changed drastically in the last 3 years.  I got married, got pregnant with my son, and then I went and got pregnant again and had a little girl...  I've been busy..

This Sunday I will be turning 36, and I have to say, I loved being 35 and I'm looking forward to my journey to 40.  This past week I was thinking about what I was doing 10 years ago, and all I have to say is...... 25 was much different then 35, so I decided to list some of the differences, here we go...

25: Loved going clubbing with my friends.  Went out most weekends and sometimes during the week and wouldn't get home until at least 1am.

35: I went to a club a couple of weeks ago for the first time in who knows how long to celebrate a friends birthday (now I only go out for special and mostly preplanned occasions).  I only went because the club was down the block from my house.  I stayed for 2 hours had 2 watered down drinks, and it took my 2 days to recover.

25: Lived in a 1 bedroom apartment in Flushing, Queens in the same building as my parents.

35: I now live in 2 bedroom apartment in a huge Upper West Side building complex with my husband and 2 children.

25: I was a proud member of the social site Migente.com under the name Firelily where I got to keep up with my friends sexy pictures, and meet guys who were obviously interested in intelligence..

35: I am a proud member of the social sites Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Blogger, Pintrest, Etsy, & Google+ under my married name and/or my blogger name Big Apple Mami.  I keep up with family and friends from high school and college.  We basically post the latest pictures of our children, and share how tired we are.  Occasionally we get to post pics of the fabulous food we eat when we go out with our partner..but mostly we post pics of the food we make at home...

25: After running a teen program for 2 years, I had been told once again from my boss that the organization I worked for lost most of the money for the program I ran, and that I should start looking for another job.  This is when my father basically yelled at me to apply for the teaching fellows..

35: After being accepted into the Teaching Fellows program I taught 5 grade & middle school in the the Bronx and Brooklyn.  Today I am in my 8th year of teaching and after 7 years of teaching teens I am loving being a 2nd grade ICT Teacher in Brooklyn Heights.  I never thought I would love the little ones...

25: If I'm correct I was living with a guy that my friends and family all hated, but I think we broke up after my first year teaching when I was 26.  I try to forget the stupid boyfriends...

35: Married to my childhood friend and love of my life, I don't know what took me so long to admit how much I loved him.  Thank goodness he never stopped trying to get in touch with me, and I am so glad I picked up the phone 8 years ago even though I didn't recognize the number.

So there you go, some major differences in my life.  I was very happy back then and I'm even happier now....I hope to look back in another 10 years with a whole new list of happy differences... 

The "N" Word

As a 2nd grade teacher and a parent I definitely use the word "no" throughout my day.  During my first pregnancy I did a lot of reading about parenting, and I came to find out that Americans are scared to say "no" to their children.  One article said that while they understand that you might be put in a situation that requires you to say "no",  you shouldn't say it often.  While I was reading this I thought, "what the hell has happened to the parents of my generation??" My mother said "no" to me all the time and I am a very well adjusted adult that understands that sometimes there are limits.  I also read that parents don't want to say "no" to their child because they don't want to expose them to negativity, and they don't want to stunt their curiosity and creativity.  ARE THEY CRAZY!?! Even if you decided not to say "no" to your child they will know how to say "no" to you.

When I went back to work in September I didn't have a permanent position so I was placed in a school in Greenpoint,  Brooklyn.  While helping out in classes PreK-2nd grade I encountered something I have never seen before, the child of a hipster.  My 6 weeks in this school was an eye opener, and I have worked with kids for over 10 years.  The majority of my experience has been with kids ages 10-18 from low income neighborhoods.  I have dealt with my share of bad attitudes, smart ass remarks, ignorant parents, and even kids in gangs.  I'll take all of that over a child who is from a middle or upper class neighborhood, being raise by a well educated parent who doesn't believe in saying "no". 

I feel that our society, these parents, and sometimes our education system are doing an injustice to our kids.  We have started worrying so much about the mental and emotional stability of our children that we have forgotten that they are smart, resilient, able to handle everyday life frustrations, and major tragic events.  When our children go out into the real world they are going to hear the word "no" over and over again and they will not be prepared for that if they don't hear it from their parents first.  When parents send their children to school and their child has no concept of rules and limits, not only does the teacher suffer but the child and parents suffer too.  The child doesn't learn as much as they can because the teacher is too busy managing the child's inability to understand why the whole class doesn't revolve around them.  The parents suffer from embarrassment and deciding weather they are going to stick to their parenting philosophies, or if they are going to take the time to teach their child limits and how to follow rules.  Changing a child's behavior when they become school aged is not impossible, but its not a battle any parent wants to take on.

I believe that children feel safe when they have limits, guidelines, rules, consistency, and consequences.  When they know what to expect from the adults around them they relax and enjoy being a child without worrying about what will happen next.  This is another reason why sometimes children behave at school but are crazy at home.  At school their is a schedule, rules, hopefully clear consequences and many limits.  If a child understands how to function inside the box then they will be able to use all their curiosity and creativity to explore the outside of the box.

The minute my son started crawling I started saying no to him because this is when he started getting into things.  I felt that even thought I needed to make changes in my life to accommodate my child, he also needed to realize that somethings don't belong to him.  My husband and I decided that we will not allow our child to take over the apartment.  His stuff belongs in his room and he will learn that he is not allowed to touch everything in the common areas of the apartment.  Don't get me wrong, he touches stuff, but we say "no", explain to him that he is not allowed to touch, and then do it again if he touches stuff again.  Even though he is 16 months he understands what he can and cannot do, and he tests the limits but it is my job to teach him those limits.  I know if I teach my children limits now I won't have to do it later, therefore, I believe that you should say "no" as often as you need to, its one of our many rights at a parent.

I'm Back...

It has been almost a year since I've blogged, and just when I was getting good...lol  somehow I allowed life get in the way, again.

Since I've been gone, I have move way uptown to 135th, I started working again, my son is now 16 months, and I'm expecting a little girl in March.  To say the least I been a bit busy.  I was so afraid to go back to work because I was worried that I just wouldn't have the energy for my son when I got home, especially being pregnant.  Little did I know that just like everything else in my life I just seem to find the energy and go... That's not to say that I don't come home completely wiped out, but I some how do what I have to do until my munchkin goes to bed.

I am happy to be back and I plan to blog at least once a week about all the crazy stuff that goes through my never resting mind..

Are You the nanny??

When you live on the upper west side there are some things that you get use to. The women who don't wear bras in the summer with white sun dresses. The the smell of dog pee on every block because everyone has a dog, and of course the nanny's with the very expensive strollers. No matter where you go in this neighborhood you will see nanny's with anywhere between 1 and 3 children. Most of these nanny's are Latina, African America, or West Indian.

Growing up in a Puerto Rican lower middle income household the idea of a nanny did not exist. If you needed someone to take care of your kids for the night you had a family member or the neighbor who also has kids to babysit for you. Even now, I have a hard time with the idea of getting a nanny even thought I might need one in the near future.

After being home for the first three months of my sons life I decided that I wanted to take Gymboree classes. I thought it would be a good to have some place to go twice a week and I would have a chance to meet other moms who lived in the neighborhood. My mom and my sister said that I would probably meet nanny's, but I didn't think moms would want their nanny's to take their kids to Gymboree since its such a wonderful bonding experience.  I went to my first class and to my surprised, all the adults were nanny's, I was the only mom.  It's really strange to be the only parent in a room with 12 other women.  It turns out that not only do the nanny's take the babies to Gymboree, some of the moms are home and they send the nanny instead of going themselves.. Now I get the whole nanny thing if you decide to go back to work, work from home, or if you have multiple small children at home and you need the extra help. But to be a stay home mom who also has a nanny and doesn't take the opportunity to do things with your baby like Gymboree, I just don't get it.

Check out the nanny it the upper right corner

I learned real quick that I was a strange duck in this pond of nanny's. Not only did I stay home with my son and take care of him without help, I am a Latina woman who lives in this neighborhood (who also has an expensive stroller). When I looked around the Gymboree class, the street and the park, I realized that I looked like the nanny. It became normal for people to ask me if I was Francisco's mother or his nanny. I am fair skinned, and obviously Latina, my son is also fair and it is possible that he doesn't belong to me even though I think he looks like me. The sad thing is, I don't get offended. How can I?, it's the culture of this neighborhood and my situation is very rare.

After a couple of weeks in my Gymboree class I did meet some mothers who stayed home with their children without any help and we have become friends.  I've also made friends with some of the nanny's, and while nanny's tend to stick together I don't see why I can't become friends with them since there or more of them around.  Besides I'll need a nanny in the future and this gives me a chance to do some head hunting...


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